Life Of The Young Hearts
by Samcoz95
Summary: Claire has an ordinary shy life, until she realizes she falls in love with her long known friend Shawn Mars that she has known all her childhood. What kind of relationship will they have when they live next door and in the same school? Only her heart will tell, and Shawn's heart will strive for hers... Meet the new characters in the Scott Pilgrim world and read today! Thank you!
1. Letters From Away

**Letters From Away**

Did Claire really have it all planned out? Did she know she was going to fall in love with a boy across the street from her childhood home? You'd think it would just be a silly coincidence they're both American, go to the same high school, and be in the same school musical together, right? Well the two have known each other for a long time, just not real bonding relationships as friends.

_Claire is in love with Shawn Mars._

"Claire is in love with Shawn Mars?" Daniela asks Sam with much concern, making me really uncomfortable to listen to.

"Daniela, quit it! It's not official for me yet.." I say in quiet discreet.

"Really Claire? Do tell us about Shawn," Sam says to me with her pixie-looking hair that I've loved since the beginning of the summer. I'm not jealous I swear!

"One would only slip away and ignore what her friends would say at times of stress or in deep… LOVE!" Daniela says to annoy.

"Oh quit it. It's not like I stalk the guy. I've only known him as friends, but it's been such a long and dreaded summer for me," I say.

"More like a misconception or a cry to be in someone's arms," Sam says to us before she goes to get her breakfast. Oh, it's the morning of a Tuesday.

_MORNING OF A TUESDAY_

"I think you have the hots for him Claire.. you just need to admit it all along," Daniela winks at me.

".. Something like this, feels like it's away and apart from love. Maybe I just want to get to know him more and be his friend."

"I just think it's sweet you have a small feeling for someone Claire. It's been a while since.. you know."

She looks at me while saying that with a poor squint of her eyes, still sitting in her seat in the cafeteria with me, and Sam gets back with her cereal for breakfast.

I remain quiet..

Sam sits with us again with her trey of food, breaking the silence intentionally, "So they ran out of regular milk for my Lucky Charms. I had to get chocolate milk."

"Wow, that sure does suck Sam. Maybe if you would ask someone-" before Daniela could finish her sentence, I completely blocked the conversation and looked in the opposite direction where our table was facing.

Shawn had arrived finally! He always gets to school kind of late, but this time he's here for breakfast…

I just had to focus and block out any unwanted voices near me and just stare at him walk to the drama room near the cafeteria. What a sight to see in his grey zip-up jacket, walking with his black jeans and sneakers.. He just seems so…

"-hey Claire, don't daze off now! Remember we have a test for Economics later," Daniela interrupts my vision to Shawn, and back to them.

"Oh, I had.. almost forgotten."

"I don't know why they even serve chocolate milk when they only serve cereal that doesn't need it," Sam says.

"So I think the rest of this year is gonna be filled with more and more free time for us seniors! Ain't that right Sam? We only got a couple of classes to worry about, and the rest are just free time for us," Daniela says.

"Oh right! If only we could-"

Then my eyes suddenly get locked on to him again walking with a friend I haven't seen before, but he's still looking oh so great.. I just want to talk with him more is all. If only there was a way..

So my classes are pretty okay. I have a computer class in the morning along with another right after, with Economics and Math followed. Then lunch with my friends, and then I have an elective I'd rather not talk about..

Now since it's the beginning of Fall, there is a winter musical hosted by the drama club every year. That elective I mentioned? It's Theater Arts. It's where we act and play loud talking and acting games. Now I am a pretty shy person if you'd met me. My theater class teacher is the director for the musical this winter, and it just so happens Shawn is going to be in the musical, since he's been in theater since he was a freshman.

I know this because.. um, not because I stalk him or anything, that would be weird..

And I'm thinking of joining this year's musical, whatever it is, for a 'chance' with Shawn. You know, just to be friends I swear! Just friends!

_THE WEEKEND_

"Oh god, I don't know if I can do it.."

"Claire, this is your choice, and you cannot do it if you want to."

"I know Sam, but it's hard to decide! I really want to get into it, ya know, just cuz it's my senior year.."

"Well now's your chance!" she takes me afterschool to pick up an audition form from the drama room. Oh how nervous I feel about all this…

…

I don't think I've had time to introduce myself. I'm Claire Walls, and I lived in Toronto all my life, except where I was born in New York back in America. I like a lot of music and vintage junk, but those are just details.

Anyways, my life at this point could be actually going somewhere, despite the fact I'm actually involved in something this year and I really don't usually like being with others I don't know. I hate making new friends in other words.

The kind of music I like is kind of weird if you think about it. I like from old indie rock to new progressive and alternative music. I'm kind of changing what I listen to often.

I kind of wish I had more friends and kids to listen to and talk to, but I think I'm perfectly fine with chilling with my friends with me now. After all, I consider myself really shy. I think I already mentioned that.

"So you gonna fill out the form yet?" Sam tells me on my bed in my room, with blankets over her and I just sit on my chair of my desk looking at the paper still.

"I am still thinking… on actually filling it out."

"Well if you fill it out and turn it in, it'll give you a chance to be in the play with 'you know who'!" she throws a small pillow at me. Playfully I smile and attempt to throw it back.

"Well why don't YOU go with me!" then I get a blanket and cover her face, both of us screaming and just having fun in my room on a Saturday night.

The next Monday I had filled out the form and returned it to the director and told him I was really nervous. And I mean REALLY nervous.. I didn't know what to expect, this would be my first musical ever if I even make it..

"Alright Claire thanks for turning it in. As you know this year we will be doing the well-known musical that everyone should know at least, Gre-"

I heard the door from the way you come in from open, and it was… HIM!

I just imagined him looking at me for a split 3 seconds… THREE SECONDS! I couldn't believe he would look at me for that long, after seeing my dark blue jacket zipped up and a purple v neck underneath. My light brown hair to go with my grey Vans and blue jeans. At least I thought it matched..

That's like my casual and comfortable/usual clothing on a Monday or Thursday. Just saying.

"Hey Mr. H, I went over one of the songs and I noticed a certain high part that I can't really get into that I-" Shawn gets interrupted talking to the director from him getting a cell phone call from somebody.

"Hold on Mars, I have a call. Why don't you meet our new cast member Claire Walls," he says cheerfully and goes into his office to talk on his phone, leaving us two alone…

"Claire… I already know you," he says to me first. I think he could tell I was blushing already, from when he said that…

"Oh um, yeah… do you remember me? We lived next to each other for a long time now.." I reply nervously.

"Yeah I know the same Claire Walls I've always known. Ever since we were kids on 10th Street."

10th Street is the street we both live on, and both of us have been neighbors in that neighborhood for so long, it's hard to remember certain things now.. but that street was where memories were made.

"Yeah that's right.." I hold my satchel on my side a little tighter, feeling a little nervous. My hair just feels a little soft all of a sudden.

"Well this year we got to catch up since it's our senior year! I say we both hang out at lunch or someplace cool with friends on a weekend. I say we should be closer than ever-" I only thought how I couldn't believe what he was saying…

HE WANTS TO HANG OUT!

Then I went back to hearing what he was saying, only to realize I daydreamed for a second, and I only heard his last words of his sentence saying, "-a better and cooler time this year. Don't you think?"

I seemed a little dazed, and I hadn't remembered what he was saying, but I just agreed whatever he said and nodded with a smile following.

"All right kids off to class, its Monday remember?" Mr. H tells us after he leaves his office and Shawn looks at me.

"I guess I'll see you around Claire.. wait afterschool on Wednesday for auditions! I almost forgot," he says then waves bye to us, and leaves the room.

I only remain silent, thinking about him… then I realize he said 'auditions on Wednesday' and I said, "Oh crap.."

LUNCH TIME

"So you need a song to sing for auditions yes?" Daniela asks me with Sam next to her, all of us sitting on a lunch table.

"Well yeah.. and it's got to be a song I can actually sing or get it right.."

"Ooh! If I had a choice I would know which one to pick already," Sam says.

"If only your cousin Stephen Stills could help me out on this…"I reply.

Sam has a cousin in a band that lives in town and he's the singer/guitarist in it. They call themselves Sex Bob-omb. I've only met Stephen and Kim, the drummer of the band, which leaves some other guy on bass I think?

"I'll figure it out don't worry girls."

"Claire, you have an awesome voice. Your two best friends know that already!" Daniela says nudging Sam on her right arm.

"Thanks you two.."

"No, thank you!"

"No really, I mean it Dani."

"Yeah and I mean it too Claire."

"But I mean it first."

"And I mean it also first."

"-you can't do that!" the three of us laugh and let out a sigh simultaneously.

Then I let out a worried sigh really quick for them not to notice.

…

THE DAY CAME

I chose a song to sing for the audition. It's called Elevator by Box Car Racer. I chose it because it's the most recent song I have listened and found out about, so why not sing it in right?

The day came for auditions after school, and I was so totally not ready. I mean I practiced at home and all, but I don't know how it's all going to work.. Would anyone be watching me? What will the director think of my voice? I wonder what Shawn is going to sing…

So it became after school already and my nerves were getting on my nerves.

"Ready singer girl?" Sam says to me jokingly with a smile.

"I don't know…" I reply, both of us walking to the drama room.

"Oh I just know you're going to do great Claire! I would say you are a natural at singing!"

"Thanks Sam…"

"I really think you can do this. Hey, listen…" she grabs me by the shoulders with both her hands. "I know you got this. Okay? You are an awesome singer."

Thanks Sam. I only thought it, up until the director Mr. H. came outside from the drama room in school to see us.

"Hey there she is! Come on in and show us what you got," he goes inside the room leaving the door open for me.

"Oh Sam, I'm really nervous…"

"Claire, I believe you can get a part."

I smile a little and hold my satchel on my side tight as usual. Then I go into the drama room.

"Step into my office and you can start," Mr. H. says to me..

I nod, and my heart begins to beat fast…

I walk into his office, he closes the door behind me, and I see Shawn sitting on a couch against a wall. Then that's when I blushed red and squinted my eyes.. oh no…

"Hey again Claire, we're ready for ya," he says with his cool sitting motions. Well, sitting motion as in just sitting.

Mr. H. sits on a rolling chair next to his computer which was next to the couch that Shawn was sitting in. Both of them looking at me and waiting for me to start.

I only stand still and keep an awkward stance as they wait for me. My eyes still a little squinty and my blushed cheeks become still with red.

They smile as in 'Go ahead and start please'.

Then I only look at Shawn.

I sing the song I chose, and when I stopped, I did nothing but blush a little and just stand in front of them, waiting for them to say something.

"Wow Claire, I didn't know you had such a voice.. You sound-" Shawn says gracefully, but Mr. H. interrupts his sentence.

"-really a go-girl! You have the voice and the figure, alright Claire you are in," he says smiling and wanting to shake my hand while standing up, and I only look at them with surprised looks.

"Well thanks for coming by," he puts his hand back down, "we'll see you around, and to be announced of our schedule for rehearsal."

Shawn walks me out of the drama room and I could see my friends Daniela and Sam only feet away from the front door. Shawn talks to me.

"Hey Claire, you have such a great voice. I… never knew that about you.."

"Oh…"

"Yeah.. I never knew.." he looks at me.

"Well I'll see you later then, okay Claire?"

"Um.. yes?"

"Alright then, see ya." He goes back into the drama room slowly. Then I turn to my friends and smile at them with excitement, and they both look at me with happy faces. I walk to them about to say that I was in the play…

Then I tripped and fell forward and landed on my right arm. It hurt for only a little, but I ignored it while my friends helped me up in my clumsy state. I ignored it because I was dazed.. and I was too excited.

AND THEN, I WAITED


	2. Thoughts On Yes

**Thoughts On Yes**

"_Oh your eyes…"_

"_My.. eyes?"_

"_Yes Claire.. They're beautiful…"_

"_I.."_

"_I just love looking into them, so beautiful like you."_

"_Shawn, you-"_

"_I mean it you…"_

"_I don't know what to say.."_

"_I think I want to kiss you."_

_He leans in on me and we kiss… with such grace and slowly backing away both of us, we kiss again._

…

FRIDAY?

"Is it Friday already? I couldn't even tell with all the work and all we've been doing," Daniela says to me and Sam as we leave to go outside to go home. I think I was forgetting something as I thought in my mind.

Then we see Shawn going the opposite direction into the school, and he puts his keys in his pocket.

"Claire! Where you going? We got our first rehearsal tonight," he says to me.

"Oh, that must be what I had forgotten. Can I…" I stopped to blink long.

"Yes?"

I could see Sam and Daniela looking at me at the corner of my eyes, winking at me, which makes me smile. Then Shawn notices..

"Well then, let's head all back in then! I'm sure your folks will understand you got rehearsal now."

"Yeah, it's no problem, I can just tell them."

THE FOLLOWING FRIDAY

"You guys are doing Grease?" Daniela says to me after school outside as we wait to be picked up.

"Yeah, I guess I didn't read the fine print correctly… I don't think I've ever seen the movie," I reply.

"Well my mom knows the play inside and out! We even have the movie, you can watch it with us," Sam says confidently, while looking to Daniela as well, making her smile.

"That sounds fun Sam.."

She knew it did.

My mom soon showed up to pick me up to go home, but not before Daniela asks, "Wait Claire, what character are you playing as? Have they told you anything?"

"I'm a girl named Jan. I think she's part of one of the main groups or whatever." I reply with little care, then I had to leave to go to my mom's car. I wave goodbye to my best friends and get into my mother's car.

"Hey honey. How did this week go? Well today I mean," my mom asks me as I sit in the front seat of our four-seated mobile of destruction. It's a Sedan or whatever.

"Um, today was okay, but my week went pretty long. Or at least it felt like it did. There was quite few work to be done, but from the rehearsals, it's getting challenging.."

"Oh well that's good to hear honey. The play must be doing you good in communicating yes? Isn't there acting going on?" she asks as we leave the school and head home.

"The acting is the difficult part. I can do the singing that's assigned to me, but the acting is sort of different from what I've ever done. Like ever."

"Well don't give up on any of it Claire, I think something great can come from this you're doing," she says while smiling at me, us still going home.

I didn't say anything after our conversation, but I asked her if I can go to Sam's house on Saturday, and she said yes. That was before I just stared out the window as we still go home, with the radio off like usual..

When I got home, I greeted my dad and let my parents be to themselves, all lovely and what not. I went to my room and got comfortable.

So it's a Friday evening, no plans for tonight, and I feel like doing something. So I get in the mood.

When I say I "get in the mood" I mean daydream away into whatever I feel like. Like right now, I would want to daydream me staring into the ocean. Alone..

Oh, I forgot to get comfortable:

I took off my Vans shoes along with my jacket I wore today, and proceeded to change the shirt I was wearing at the time. I went from long sleeve to short sleeve.

Then I removed my jeans and slipped into my pajama shorts (I call them that because I always sleep with them. Ok, you know those shorts that those athletic girls wear when they're performing or at a practice or something? C'mon you had to have seen them. Athletic shorts. Yeah, I'm wearing those now, with my stupid chubby but not so chubby thighs showing).

(But I don't even play sports, I wear them only to sleep in.)

I lay in my bed and pull out my iPod. I have a set list that plays some of my favorite alternative artists from A – Z.

Then I just stare out into my window with the curtains on my window rolled out, so I can see all the clouds and light rain fall. Seems pretty chill right? Yeah.

I get kind of cold, so I just cover up my legs and feet and continue looking outside. I could see the two trees separated and away from the driveway that was in the middle of the trees. We have a long driveway for our residence.

The clouds form and it continues to sprinkle light drops of rain out. Now I daydream…

_ So I'm at some beach, and it feels really hot. I just keep staring into the ocean, letting the waves and water go forward to hit my toes and makes me think of good things. Just the little good things…_

_I turn quickly to my left and see a figure jogging towards the spot I was in, along the beachside._

_It was Shawn!_

"Hey Claire, how you doing?" my mom interrupts me and walks halfway opening my door to my room.

"Oh um I'm okay mom. Are you going anywhere with dad?"

"Well no. We're both pretty tired from work, so this weekend we're just going to lay it back and keep it down low," she says trying to sound cool.

"Okay that's fine."

"Well… I'll leave you to it then. Goodnight then," she says to me then leaves and goes to her room.

I just keep looking outside.

The more I think about Shawn the more I get a tingly feeling, and makes me want to… get a little frisky.. down there…

Now don't call me weird or anything, I just get a little feeling that makes me want to… you know, get excited. Now let me get a little clear on something: masturbation is a totally normal and fine feeling for anyone. There's no need to rant and get offensive or uncomfortable. It's normal to me. I think to everyone, it should be normal to get those kinds of "urges" or "wants" if you want to get technical.

Now I'm not saying that I _did _masturbate that night, I was just thinking about Shawn and it got me feeling… horny. That's all. I didn't do anything else, I just turned off my iPod when I heard the playlist and fell asleep afterwards.

My room gets pretty dark when the curtains and door is closed along with no lights on.

…

So Saturday comes along with my plans with Sam, and it begins with _him_ being in my nightly dream the night before, and it was kind of seductive in a way. Call me crazy, but this guy I've known all my life is getting into my dreams and is seducing me in a way I would rather find uncomfortable. Like I said, it's normal to have an urge for something that has to do with sexual contact, or something like that.

Anyways when I woke up that morning I had awoken feeling weird. So I get up from my bed and go to the kitchen where I find my mom eating toast.

"There's one for you too darling! Grab one and watch T.V. with me," she suggested as she sat comfortably on a couch in front of the television.

I smiled a little and just looked at her watching TV on the couch, as I get my piece of toast and eat it quickly while I go back to my room to take a shower and get ready.

When I was done finished I went outside really quick to check how the weather was feeling. When I went out to the front of our house, I looked straight ahead and across my vision was Shawn's house, just sitting normally on a Saturday morning.

I waited a bit to see if he would come outside without me asking for him, but I then turned back… and went back inside.

It was then noon, and I read for a while and almost finished one of my mother's books I borrowed from her. Afterwards I get a call from Sam, asking if I could come over to her house right away. I asked my mom if it was okay, then she agreed, then I put my shoes on and jacket along with my satchel/purse thing, and went outside.

As I'm walking to Sam's house on a quite chilly day noon day, I notice of the corner of my eye I see someone leaving Shawn's house, and I couldn't help but look who it was. It was a man I think I've never seen before, approaching me. I felt a nervous thought go through my mind and body, only feeling scared as I looked at him..

He approaches me and asks, "Sorry. Are you Claire Walls?" putting his hands back into his pockets of his jeans.

I reply in a nervous tone, "Yes.. I am. Who are you?"

"I'm Shawn's dad. Sorry I didn't address to you before, and sorry for just walking up to you like that."

"Um, it's okay..?"

"You've known Shawn for a long time now, right? We've been neighbors for a long time as well.." he says.

"Yes, we have known each other for a long time…" I became suspicious..

He smirks and releases a chuckle, "Yeah, he always reminds me of that.."

I reply in concern, "Wait what do you mean?"

"Well I'm just saying he just mentions you a lot, and he brings that up quite a lot as well. You're just mentioned in our house."

I felt a little scared but had a warm feeling.

"…He uh.. cares about you Claire. You might not see it, but it's the truth."

I remain silent as I just let his words go through me, feeling a bit warmer from what he said. Why was he telling me this? Does Shawn really mean that? Why haven't I talked to him recently?

He then said goodbye and I didn't call back Shawn's dad from going back into their house.

I went on walking to Sam's house, it wasn't very far anyway, so kept walking.

"So his dad just walked up and talked to you?" Sam asks me as we're in her room at her house, both on her bed with her laptop sitting on our side, while the laptop plays music in a low volume.

"Yeah it was really random. He said that Shawn talked about me a lot in their house, I don't know why.."

"Aw maybe that's a sign! You should feel special! Just saying," she makes me blush a little.

"Sam, have you ever felt like you like someone so much?"

".. I've never had a boyfriend. I haven't even kissed a boy. It's kind of a virgin feeling if you think about it."

"Wow Sam… I hadn't known that about you.." I reply looking at her.

"It's not that I don't feel happy or anything. Maybe it's that I feel like I am missing out on what it feels like to be loved and wanted for someone else. You know? I'm not sure how I ever feel about boys."

"I see what you mean Sam."

"It doesn't bother me though. I guess because I haven't felt it before, but sometimes I wonder and think too hard on the things I would like to look upon, you know?"

"Yeah I think."

"I try not to think about it much. But what makes me feel comfortable, with whom I'm with.." Sam looks down at her computer with me still looking at her.

"..Do you want to talk about?"

"Maybe when I know what to say about it all.."

I nodded and understood what she meant.

…

When I got home that Sunday after Sam's I went over my lines for the play. We're doing Grease. You know that one with the 1950's retro and dancing look? Yeah I'm in it. I'm the character Jan.

There are songs in the musical I have to rehearse and go over, so we could all sing and perform in unison. I'm not really nervous about singing, just when I'm alone in front of others is kind of nerve-wrecking. Doesn't that bother you?

I didn't feel like reading after I went over my lines like a billion times on Sunday. I still kept thinking about what Shawn's father told me and what Sam was saying the night before. It's just so sudden how Shawn would think that… wait, could he be thinking that all this time since we have known each other? What would he think of me when I barely realize? When I'm barely falling for him…

What would he be thinking? I get so concerned and worried when I don't know things and it gets me scared or worried about it…

_I always keep thinking. I always do._

Sam seemed pretty serious about talking about herself being alone. I wonder what she really feels about her surroundings, about boys. About girls…

Anyway, a lot happened this week.


	3. If YOU Were In Love

**If YOU Were In Love…**

What would you do? Honestly I think I'm just falling more and more into this guy. Shawn Mars.

Shawn Mars, why don't you just talk to me? Why do I keep thinking you are thinking things about me? Why do I feel this way about you? I wonder if you feel the way I do. I wonder if any of you reading would see what I feel, or feel what I see.

"Claire, you sing really well." Shawn says to me after rehearsal on a Friday night. I haven't called my mom or dad to pick me up yet, so why not talk to Shawn for a bit right? Right..?

"Thanks Shawn… you know I think you sing really awesome too."

"I've always liked singing actually, it just feels natural and… it feels good to release your voice."

'Release your voice'? How could I follow that? That's some good poetry if you ask me, and I couldn't cope or even think about writing stuff like that.

"That sounds nice Shawn, that's heartwarming.." I say as we both go outside where other kids are being picked up from rehearsal. It's 7:32 at night.

"Yeah.."

"Um, yeah." I reply.

"Hey, do you need a ride home? I mean we do both live across from each other," he said reassuring me. Then he says again before I could speak again, "Wait I should have asked you for a ride earlier when we started rehearsal, I'm sorry, I wouldn't want your parents to be spending gas money when in could just help you."

He sounded so caring and reassuring..

"Oh that's alright Shawn, it's not a problem. Thank you."

"Right.. So do you need… a ride home?" he was really concerned if I would go home with him…

I thought for a bit. "Yeah sure Shawn.."

"Okay cool, let's leave shall we?" we head to his cool two-seated car.

When we went into his car we put on our seatbelts and he turned on the car. He put the heater on a bit since It was kind of chilly out, and the sort of loud music started playing from his car right when he turned it on.

"Oh sorry, I was jamming out when I got to school today, I love Green Day," he said as he reversed back from the parking lot and went on a street headed home.

"I like Green Day too! Maybe not as much as you but I sure like their music," I say as well.

"Badass, Claire!" he keeps driving and he made me smile a little..

"So how are your friends doing? Daniela and, who's the other girl again?"

"Oh she's Sam my other best friend. You know them?"

"Well not exactly but I had Daniela last year for physics. It was funny those days.."

"That's nice. Yeah both of them are pretty funny, and they're doing great."

"Cool. What about your parents? My dad actually hasn't talked to your parents in a long time, and I was wondering when they might be able to chat again. Wouldn't they just keep talking in the past?"

"Yes, my parents are so lame.."

"Yeah my dad is too, trying to always give me advice. I love him," he says while stopping at a red light before an intersection.

"So have you memorized all your lines yet for Grease?" I ask.

He chuckles, "Nope. Well not all of them, but it feels like when I'm on stage, I can sort of remember them when others say their lines as well, which helps me I think."

"Wow that's good for you. I almost got whatever I have down, just certain parts I need to remember here and there."

The light turns green and we go forward.

"That's awesome Claire, you are gonna do great with us," he smiles at me.

Then It got a little quiet between us in the car.. then he breaks the silence.

"We've known each other for a long time haven't we..?"

I stay quiet for a bit then reply, "Yeah we have."

"Our childhood was so fun. It's good to catch up again Claire."

"Yeah it… is."

"It's like we're still old friends. Ya' know?"

"I see what you mean."

"We're just catching up again, which is good."

"Yeah it is good.." then we arrive home finally he parks his car in the driveway of his home while the both of us get out of his car.

We end up on the driveway to my house and he's next to me under the dark sky, with the cold air that surrounds us.

"Well I guess I'll see you later then Shawn, I should get inside," I say to him holding my satchel tight and walking towards my house.

"Alright catch you later then. Goodnight," he says while going back into his car.

I turned back to look at him while he drives in reverse professionally into his driveway, and I think he catches me still looking at him while he got out of his car. I blushed a little to myself. I thought how nice it was of him to offer me a ride, well, afterall our houses were right next to each other, so it's still nice to even offer.

I check the front door of my house and it seemed to be unlocked. So I walk inside and I see my dad on a sofa watching TV.

"Hey where were you? Did you stay late or..?" my dad asks me while I go up to him.

"Yeah, and my friend dropped me off. I didn't want anyone to worry but I still managed to get here anyway. Where's mom?" I ask.

"She had to work late for a bit tonight. I think she'll be back in a couple of minutes."

"Okay then.." It always felt awkward with my dad and I together. I don't know why, it just did. I guess because we're both of the different gender and we have little to relate to…

"Was it a boy who dropped you off tonight?" he asks before I left the living room and he turns down the volume of the TV.

"Um yeah actually. A friend," I respond looking at him.

"Oh okay. Was it a close friend or..?"

I think he was just waiting for me to say who it was, so I told him.

"Shawn Mars from down the street."

"Oh that guy! We've known his family for a while now haven't we? How's he doing?"

"Yeah he's doing good. And yes we have known him."

"Swell kid. I wonder if he's changed a bit after those years.."

My dad made me wonder about that. My dad always made me wonder. A lot of things. Come to think of it, he always made sure things were okay with our family, and I think that's how my mom married him in the start, and I know they'll always be together.

When I went to my room I got comfortable again and just chilled on my warm bed, from the outside cold and chill. I was falling asleep until I heard my mom open the front door and talk to my dad for a bit then heard the TV turn off from the living room and they must have went to sleep too.

While me still awake I kind of thought about Sam. How she is and how she feels about stuff. I seem really concerned on how Sam thinks, I guess because I want to know what she was thinking about on that one Saturday night of us alone.

Later that night I then thought of Shawn. Why else wouldn't I think about him? I already know he's been caring and thinking about me for so long, which explains why he offered to take me home tonight. I wonder what he really wants to think about. What he really thinks and knows about me… I'm too scared.

I'm too scared to talk serious to him and say these things I keep thinking of. I think I'll have to spill something to him eventually, but it's so hard to even say these things! Like I have so many questions to ask and say all these things, I can't explain how much I would want to say! It's hard. It really is…

And I don't even want to think about if he even feels the way… I do..

…

On Sunday I wake up at around noon and take a shower as soon as I get out of bed. The day before on Saturday I just stayed home and went thrift shopping with my parents, good spending time with them. When I got out of the shower I got myself dry quickly before the more cold got to my body and I went to my room covered up in a towel. I got dressed slowly into comfortable clothes just because nothing was happening today.

I always check my phone carelessly when I get out of the shower in the mornings for school or for weekends when I wake up right after, and I did this time, then I see I got a text minutes ago from an unknown number. The text read, "Hey Claire it's Shawn Mars from across the street! I was wondering if you wanted to go walking around the park and to a coffee shop to get some café coffee! Would you want to go? Sorry for the sudden notice lol"

It was Shawn. I didn't know what to say, I didn't know if I wanted to go or to do anything at all today, and I was speechless.. like I didn't know if it was actually him or like he was ACTUALLY talking to me through phone! I couldn't believe it. I'm such a girl…

I asked him through text, "Hey Shawn. How did you get my number?"

He responds a minute later, "I got it from your friend Daniela, I asked her for it on Friday. Sorry I didn't tell you before!"

I saw his sympathy, "It's okay don't worry. Hey I'll ask my mom really quick if I can go into town with you okay?"

Then he responds with a smiley face, ":)"

I go to my mom's room with her on the bed with my dad, still asleep, and my mom is on her laptop with headphones on.

"Hey mom goodmorning. Hey can I go into town with my friend Shawn Mars? He lives down the street from us."

"Oh yeah go ahead! Just don't come home too late okay? I want to eat dinner with you and your father." She responds with a straightforward face and a little smile, while my dad was snoring a little. It made us both smile.

I run back to my room and get my phone and reply as quickly as I can, texting back Shawn..

He replies, "Great! Come outside and I'll be waiting so we can go out and chill. See ya!"

I got dressed kind of quickly than usual. I took off my little shorts I had on and revealed my panties I put on when I got out of the shower, and put on warm blue jeans, and found a dark blue long-sleeve to go with my black leather jacket I got on Saturday when I went shopping. I wanted to wear Converse but I couldn't find them in my closet.

When I got dressed fully and complete I looked at my full sized mirror next to my dresser and looked at my appearance, looking very warm and still. I just stood there and observed what I am today. It looks like I've grown up so fast… I can't believe I'm looking grown up and ready to go out. I don't know why I was questioning myself at that time, I guess I was nervous.

Before I went out the door I looked across the hallway to see the light of the TV and laptop of my parent's bedroom and only looked once, then walked out the door. I closed it behind me and started walking with my purse/satchel on my side, me holding onto it as I cross the street to find Shawn waiting for me with a button up shirt and blue jeans.

I approach him, "Hey Shawn…"

"What's up girl! Ready to head out?" he looked kind of relaxed.

I didn't know how to respond since I've never hung out with him, but I guess I just went with the flow. We started walking on the sidewalk down 10th street and went along the cool air. Felt pretty good if you'd ask me..

It felt nice. All of it, just walking around just being friends. It could be happier, just saying…

I could be happier, just saying.

"How are your parents doing? It's been a while since.." he asks as we walk along the sidewalk with our hands in our pockets.

"Um, didn't you ask me that already?" I say, not intending to be rude.

"Oh yeah, I forgot, I'm sorry," he says smiling a little which made me giggle.

"So was it your idea to just go into town alone or did you really want me to be with you?" I ask him concerned.

"Well now, what's wrong with inviting a good 'ol friend like Claire Walls huh?"

"I'd say it was a pretty bad idea boy." I respond.

"Come on now, we can do stuff," we're at the Toronto Park where other people are just around in benches and walking around as well. It seemed nice.

"..Haven't been here in a while.."

"Yeah it's been a while hasn't it Claire?"

I think he remembers when our parents would spend time together and hang out, along with us as kids and being all childish at this very same park. He would do that…

"Doesn't it seem nice Claire? I can think of a lot of things now that we're here. Reminds me of back then.."

"Yeah, pretty nice I see…" I didn't really find it nice or interesting to be back here, it just didn't click to me. It made me kind of sad actually.

"Why are we here Shawn?" I ask him.

"Well I thought.. we could check the place out ya'know."

"But you could come here on your own, instead you invited me along with you…"

"Well i…" he stuttered a little..

I wait for his response, his hand goes behind his head like he's nervous to say.

"I'm sorry Claire, I need to tell you," we find a spot under a tree to lean against the tree to talk.

"Yes?"

"I wanted to come here with you to remember those times we had when we were kids again, just to think about my mom again… I wanted to be reminded of my mom. I wanted something to remember her by again, and now that I realize it, it kind of hurts to see it and think about it all."

I thought about it again, how his mother passed away when he was ten years old I think. It was sad.

"Shawn I'm sorry… if you wanted to, you could have just.."

"Claire it's okay, I really wanted to think about my mom again. Me and my dad do…"

"I understand Shawn it's alright.. if you want to talk just tell me," I waited for him.

"… Do you Claire?"

"I want to talk.." I respond.

We talked under that tree and leaned on it like we just had a normal long conversation about everything. I told him that I have trouble sleeping because of my thoughts and what I can't dream about, and lots of stuff, just about my life. We laughed when I told him I tripped that one time when I was walking to my friends. I felt comfortable talking and saying all that stuff to him, and it felt good. All was needed was little clouds to form in the sky to make that afternoon a good one.

Shawn told me about how he lost his mom a long time ago and that his dad is all he has, and Shawn realizes it, but his dad doesn't know that Shawn is aware. It makes me think and care for both of them, like Shawn doesn't have a lot to deliver or say. It didn't make me feel sorry for him or anything, just feel sympathy and have care for him. Come to think of it, he cares about me. A lot… and I think he deserves it.

…

When we walked back he bought a coffee from a café real quick and we both walked back home, with our hands in our pockets (not holding hands!). He still doesn't know I secretly love him…

"..and that's how I lost interest in anime months ago. It was tragic!" he tells me.

"Wow. That's sure a story to think about."

"Yeah, and I think I'll never go back," he says to me seriously with a straight face, and we both laugh after we couldn't keep a straight face together.

"Ahhh, yes."

"Yes what?"

"Oh, I had a good time Claire, I felt like I needed to talk. About all that stuff and all."

"Oh definitely, whenever you want to talk, you have my number," then we both laugh a little.

"I really did have a great time Claire, you're really fun to be with."

That made my heart melt a little, and I blush in front of him, looking down at the ground as we're outside on his driveway of his house.

He looks at me and grins a little. I could sense he's looking at me as I still look down at the ground. I slowly bring my head up to look at him, and he's looking at me with those beautiful brown eyes, to go with his black hair being pushed from the cold wind that is being blown. The clouds are still out as the sky is still dark out.

He breaks the silence, "You look really cold Claire.."

We're still looking at each other, his height is a little taller than my short self, so I look up to him only a little. He could see my blushed cheeks a little.

"I am cold.. I feel really warm though now.." my heart is beating really fast when I'm THIS close to him…

I'm up to him, then he leans in closer…

**WE KISS! OMG**

I couldn't believe he kissed me… ON THE CHEEK

"I'm sorry Claire… I-"

"No, it's okay… I just wanted-"

Then the cold wind blows and my hands are really freezing.. and he notices.

"Oh my, your hands are really cold Claire."

"Yeah, I know… I really am cold right now."

He then holds my hands with both of his hands, and I think by then he could REALLY tell I was blushing like crazy… He could see it on my face, I was real cold and blushing.

"Your hands are warm though.. why is that?" I ask him.

"… Because.. you're next to me." He responds the sweetest thing…

"Oh…"

He picks my head up from looking at the ground to looking at him from my chin, and he kisses me AGAIN.

THIS TIME ON THE LIPS!

(I think by then you'd think our relationship might have changed. Emphasis on 'might' have changed. I think it DEFINITELY did.)

After that I went home with saying goodnight to him and immediately slept after telling my parents I was home. I jumped on my bed and layed there. Thinking about HIM.

I couldn't believe that happened. He kissed me, and I just took it. I had to, I'm in love…

I couldn't stop thinking about what happened. I didn't feel embarrassed or weird about anything about it, I guess it feels different right now. His so cute face and perfect everything… listen to me sounding all creeper on him.. I don't know if I can go on about not telling him I like him so much.

I remember our small kiss together. So cute and graceful. I felt like seeing him again and just thinking about him while I layed there on my bed…

I thought about him and just stripped off my pants and underwear underneath as I'm under like two blankets of my bed. I felt really comfortable and just thinking about him… I hope none of you think I'm weird sleeping with no underwear. It was cold, but I ignored it as I slept GREAT.

What a good night huh?


	4. She Only Needs One

**She Only Needs One**

_Does she? I don't know. It surpasses me like her knowing of my existence, and I keep wondering. Wondering how she feels. It feels like an empty wondering where you have to just wait for a reason or wait for something to happen, like words or actions from someone to appear. It kind of hurts me to wait. Wouldn't it hurt you to wait for something you're so curious for? Just wanting to know certain things really gets me. When thoughts get to hurting me, I start thinking how much I have waited and what I've lost already. I've lost so many things…_

_When I say I kept waiting I mean that I've never tried to be more of a friend than how me and Claire are right now. I've waited, and waited, until she finally spoke to me with herself. She opened my eyes to see that kind of crazy feeling I just… feel._

_Why have I barely realized this kind of girl is just so sudden and kept? I've been missing out on a girl that I've known for years all my life, and now I have strong feelings for her, yet I can't even keep myself still and straight. It hurts to know it and I can't even think on how it feels for her.._

_But that doesn't matter. I think it's what she feels about me and what I see in her that I've been blind to see. I see great things from her, yet from myself there would be nothing but… nothing. I don't see myself with her, but I think she does see herself with me. I have to give her what she needs. What I've needed and what I've waited for._

_What kind of guy like me needs a girl like her at a time like this? This is just so random, we've known each other for so long and now it's like we barely decide to be together. Not like I'm being negative but I'm just seeing and thinking things clear here. I mean I'll never tell her any of that but I want to see what more she's like again. She reminds me of a lot now that I think about her again… I don't know what it is about her. It just gets me differently._

…

"So it seems like we aren't going to make it this year," the news had been delivered to us by Mr. H telling the cast and crew of our Grease production. All of us in awe.

Mumbling and gasps were heard from the cast.

"I'm sorry to say for everyone, there isn't enough money raised and saved for this year's musical… I'm sorry to everyone to say, but we're done this winter. We'll have to start a spring musical in the spring of course, for we have NO money or help from volunteering of the booster clubs. It really saddens me… I've never had to cancel a show before, but now it… I just.." Mr. H tells us and facepalms his face and we just listen to him.

"I think that's what needed to be said sir. Thank you for the experience from all of us, I hope I answered from everyone when I said that…" Shawn stands up and says while looking at us too.

"Thank you Mars. There will be no more rehearsal and working on the things I said earlier for the crew. I'm just… sorry for telling the bad news.."

I just sat there with everyone else listening to the rest of the speech and later small bits of us started leaving the drama room. I waited for Shawn to stop talking to Mr. H, and I couldn't stop feeling bad for the both of them. I only look down to the floor.

…

"It just doesn't seem right… I don't know how that could have happened. This sucks.." Shawn tells me while we go outside to leave school. There were still some kids around outside school even if it was an hour after the school day ended. It's Monday.

"It sucks a lot Shawn, I get it too," I tell him as we go to his car. We wait near it outside.

"Yeah…"

"… Yeah."

It got a little awkward…

"Claire.. I need to tell you something," he says after he sighs.

"I… have to say something too."

"Okay, you can go first," he says to me smiling.

"No, you first, please.."

"Alright then..." he takes a breath, and sighs a little. "I have something for you."

"Um, something..?"

"I mean I have something for you. Like there's something you do to make me feel different Claire. Does that make sense?"

"Elaborate more please."

"You make me feel good Claire, like a lot.. I mean that because the kind of person you are is just so great, and I can see it now…"

"You mean…" I say.

"It's a huge feeling to me, it's what you contain is what makes me see it in you. I think it's so lovely Claire, I can't believe it's come to it all…"

"I don't know what to say… that's so nice to hear."

He slowly reaches for my hands, and I could feel they're warmer than mine. That's when I blush and smile a little.

"I enjoy your company a lot Claire, it feels so nice… how do you feel.. About that?" he asks me holding my hands.

"I…"

He's waiting for an answer.

"I love you Shawn!" it just slipped out! I HAD TO.

"You… like me?"

"No, wait, yes I do, wait no I don't, hold on… I love you," I say it all with stuttering on me.

"That's…"

"I really like you Shawn… I just can't get away from being with you.. I always think about you… I hope you don't think anything wrong of it at all…" I say with shame.

"Claire! How could I think wrong of that? That sounds so amazing to hear!"

"Wha"

"That sounds… extra amazing to hear Claire! It's exactly what I was trying to say after all this-"

"After all this what? Shawn?" I ask him as he stopped talking for a second to look at the ground.

"All this time! I've had this feeling for you that I couldn't understand and keep with…"

I THEN WAS LIKE, 'OMG'

"It's true Claire, that feeling of… love."

"I already told you Shawn… I'm in love with you, and it feels so relieved and acceptable to hear that you can feel it as well! I don't even know!"

"Right?! I mean I thought I had something wrong with me, but it was you all along! The girl I've known all this time for so long!"

Now we're both yelling at the outside of a parking lot afterschool with some kids from afar that can hear us.

He's still holding my HANDS.

"Claire… it was you all along, and now I see.."

"I knew somehow I would love you Shawn… I'm so shy to even.."

"It's okay Claire! I've waited too long anyway for something like this. I just…"

"I understand Shawn," we look at each other in the eyes and just smile with both of us looking at the ground. Then we look at each other again with such eyes, and we lean in on and kiss **ON THE LIPS!**

Oh boy have I done it now…

"Oh my gosh Shawn…"

"What is it Claire?"

"I… I can't believe I kissed you.." I say in shock.

"Aw, Claire.."

"I haven't done that… in a while really."

"Claire that's okay, neither have I…"

We just look at each other and kiss again, him leaning in this time. He really does it good by the way…

We stopped kissing and get in his car. I thought it was awkward.

The long and dreaded awkward silence that lead us home delivered me a doubt and killing thought that it was "just a kiss". I got so scared the next day…

"YOU HAD AN AWKWARD SILENCE THE WAY HOME?" Daniela says to me with emphasis at our lunch period at the cafeterium.

"Well yeah. I didn't know what to say really. And it wasn't so much silence… there was music playing that hinted things." I reply to her.

"What kind of hints?" Sam says to join on the conversation.

"Um… like little love punk songs he has on his CD or whatever."

"That's a sign Claire. It's a definite sign of stuff," Daniela says.

"What do you mean?"

"Like, it's a sign of you liking more and more about him, right? I mean you both did kiss already, who knows what else he could do spontaneously.."

OMG SHE'S RIGHT

I worried, but Sam says, "Don't worry so much about that stuff Claire, I think that's really cute yall kissed and listened to music together! Plus that's like a little bond you both could have. The same music taste!" Sam is so reassuring all the time. I love that about her.

"Yeah that's so true, and with his spontaneous actions, he could maybe do something surprising and good or something… I mean I can never be too sure about anything like that."

"Well I guess you never know," Sam replies.

"Duh! You two both know how! Claire could just talk to him and ask how he feels," Daniela replies giving an obvious reply.

"Oh yeah. That!" Sam replies.

"Um I dunno.." I say.

"I mean, you do have his phone number don't you?"

"Yes?"

"Well there you go! You both already have things in common, why not talk about things you both find interesting. Anything to help you two," Daniela really helped me out with talking and suggesting.

"Yeah! And ask if he likes books!" and so did Sam.

Music. The kind of music I like is alternative to punk and grunge rock. If anything Shawn would like, I think it would be punk rock to be his first favorite genre. I wonder if he has anything to say about any of that.

"Does he have our lunch period?"

"I don't know Sam, I haven't asked him that."

"You should ask him, I mean if he has it here, then you could talk to him more here!" she suggests.

"Uh…"

"Then you two could get closer!" Sam smiled then looks at me and Daniela, then realized she got carried away and scratched the back of her head with a smile and closed her eyes with a chuckle.

I didn't know if he had more questions or anything really he would like to talk about me and things he would bring up, so I didn't want to assume anything. I just took and listened to what my friends had to say about it all, and took their advice as closely as possible. Taking advice can be the best when talking and knowing about your friends, either you trust them or not, to me, advice is something to always listen to. You can never go wrong with the kind of advice from a well trusted friend who has been in with tough times with you, like Daniela and Sam.

Later that day I didn't see Shawn. I didn't see _him _all week actually. I don't know why but I didn't even try to see him in person, I guess I wanted him to come to me. After what my two friends just said to me on Tuesday I felt reassured and gave time to let him do something about us. Why not right? I trust. _Him._

So I haven't seen him all week, and he invites me to his house on Saturday. I ask my parents nicely and I convince them to let me. I wonder what we're gonna do there…

I knock on his front door at his house, his dad opens the door and greets me, then lets me in.

I see Shawn in the living room of the house he's been living in for years and years.. I've never actually been inside his house and remembered what it looked like. Should I feel bad?

"We'll be in the garage Dad," he says to his father and he directs me to the garage.

"I'll be making corn dogs!" his dad says to us while going to the garage for I don't know what reason.

We enter the garage and the first thing I do is kiss him on the cheek. Then he smiles to me intentionally, then I turn my head and see a guitar amplifier plugged into an electric guitar. Not just any guitar though, a light blue Fender Stratocaster with white as an additional color. It looked beautiful…

He puts the guitar strap over his shoulder and turns on the amp, and says, "Over there is a bass guitar, go ahead, grab it!"

Then I can't believe what he's saying… I only thought "Really?"

"Well? Go ahead Claire! It's yours to play!"

I smile at him and put my satchel down and grab the guitar and put the strap over my shoulder, and plug the baby into an amp and turn it on. Then I remember… the notes. The musical sound the guitar I held delivered. The feeling of my fingers pressing the strings and the oh so pretty sounds, along with melodic notes going through my head!

"There you go Claire! Play it out!" he smiles at me and I smile back! We begin…

"How did you"-

"I remembered you played a bass acoustic guitar back then. And now here we are!" he's smiling like ever, and everything that moment got me excited!

"Wow Shawn… this is so cool! I can't even tell you how much happier this makes me feel."

"It's all in good fun, for you Claire.."

"Thank you for inviting me Shawn, this is great," I play the guitar and he follows me through a coo guitar riff that allowed me and him to synchronize in music!

"Boy the feeling on my fingers feels different! I still got to get back used to it," I say to him after we stop playing.

"Well the music stuff in our garage is yours to use whenever you want my love.." he says then covers his mouth with his eyes widened.

It was like he was surprised and like those last words must have slipped out. It was so cute.

"Um, alright then Mars, that's fine. Thank you cutie," I reply to him smiling. Then he smiles back.

Now normally I wouldn't say such a thing like that, EVER. I say that because it felt comforting. It felt comfortable for me to say that and it was like I needed to say it. I would never say that to anyone, but I did for him. And it felt good.

"Food for you two, rocking out!" Mr. Mars opens the garage door and invites us back in the house with corn dogs ready for us to eat along with sweet tea.

We turn off our amps and go inside.

"Thanks for the food Dad," Shawn says.

"No problem," he replies while getting a dog and going to the living room, which had a wall in between the kitchen and living room. Leaving Shawn and I in the kitchen alone, with our dogs to be eaten.

"I am pretty hungry."

"Go right ahead Claire, it's for us."

I get a corn dog and it felt warm enough to just bite onto. So I stick more than half of the corn dog into my mouth slowly, and bite down on it. I could feel the warm and soft feel of the corn dog on my lips, then I slowly go back pulling the bitten food into my mouth and I chew with my eyes closed. Then I look at Shawn, he had a "gasping" look on his face.

"What?" I look at him funny.

"Um.. Nothing, I just ima-" he didn't get to finish his sentence.

"Can I have some tea?"

"Oh yeah sure!" he pours me a cup of warm tea. I drank from it and it tasted so good. Best.

"Hey, now that we have more time away from the musical, we can spend more time together. You know, just a thought…" he says to me sipping from his cup.

"I would be more than glad to do that Shawn," I reply looking at him with eyes like that were staring into his, like I was in love with him. (hint hint)

…

_So that's how we started our bond. She gets me more and more into her state._

_I'm so… I can't. like I want her to feel the way I do. Like I want her to feel what I feel._

_Maybe it's the other way around. I don't know._

_Now we continue what we call our growing love for each other. The rest of the winter has just begun…_

_What kind of things could we see later in the next weeks? Who would we meet during our time together? The kind of people that will be involved will be from our hearts and will impact us entirely. I wonder how she thinks this will all go along._

_It's my job to keep us together, and I aim to make it all possible, through anything that goes in our way._


	5. So It Begins

**So It Begins**

"Yes it does!" Shawn tells me as I strum the bass guitar a couple of notes, after he plays a cool power chord with a heavy sound.

"Oh I can try all I want and I think I can own you a little more than that…" I say back to him, I stick my tongue out a little while I focus on playing the guitar, and he looks at me in awesomeness.

The sound of our amps delivering the music and crunches of our riffs blow through the garage, and I think I could sense Shawn's dad, Ethan, listening along with us.

"Try to follow this!" Shawn presses as much as he can to the strings and releases the sounds of guitar chords through the air. Then I laugh and hear his ridiculous sound he made when he tried to go higher and tried to strum faster. I think I almost heard him say "Shit!" when trying to play it.

…

"You know, my cousin is in a band."

"Really Sam, and who might that be?" I reply to her with Shawn and me walking to Toronto Park, on a Saturday afternoon.

SATURDAY AFTERNOON

"My cousin Stephen. He sings!" she replies to us.

"Oh that's badass, anything else?" Shawn asks.

"Yeah, he's 23 years old, super incognito too."

We both look at each other weird and look back at Sam as we all keep walking on the sidewalk on the cold, cold concrete and cold air.

"I think he meant what else he does Sam."

"Oh! He also plays guitar while singing the songs and stuff, pretty awesome yes?"

"Yeah that does sound awesome! Pretty young guy if you ask me."

"Stephen Stills, you know he lives in our town Toronto!"

"No way? I hope to meet the guy soon, he sounds real cool Sam," Shawn sounded reassuring during the talks. I liked it.

"So here's the crazy park we used to go to a lot. Remember Claire?"

"Yes, I remember."

"Wow.. The angle of the park I'm looking at right now looks amazing… like I could paint it! That's actually not a bad idea," Sam says and pulls out her phone from unzipped coat pocket, and takes the picture from the angle she was in. She captured trees and bits of snow falling from the air.

"Time for us to put our hands in our pockets!" she says to us as we notice the small bits of snow fall gently.

"Yeah…" I say.

I wanted to do something though… oh well, I'll get my chance with him.

"Well we could still chill here if you all want, it's no bother to me," Shawn tells me.

"I'm good for whatever too, I just want to be with you…" I say back to him grinning a little.

"Of course," he rubs his nose on my right cheek, so cute.

"I have an idea! I'll call Stephen real quick and ask him what he's doing, that would be fun, wouldn't it?" Sam suggested pretty quickly, with her pixie-hair swaying a bit as she asked us.

"What do you think Claire?" Shawn asks me.

"Um… why not?"

"Cool, go ahead and call him up I guess."

"Alright I will!"

Sam then talked on the phone for a bit and went on and on through the phone as Shawn and I just stood around enjoying each other's company. Almost like it felt natural to keep being with him and staying true to saying what I felt and meant. Was that normal for me? I never felt like this before…

"Looks like we're on our way to his friend's house right now. Shall we go on?" Sam tells us and we agree.

So we walk on the sidewalk to wherever the guy's house was.

"So what about your cousin? Has it been long since you talked to him or something?" I ask her.

"Um, well not really. I mean our family is pretty chill together, but I mean we're all not that close. It's okay I guess."

"Oh alright. I hope everything's okay."

"Yeah, everything is. Except sometimes Stephen's parents can get pissed pretty easily if you ask me."

"People like that, I know," Shawn says in.

"Yeah. My aunt and uncle would be so controlling with Stephen and wouldn't let him do much around, and I would witness it. Sometimes I wonder if he would look back to what they made him do and all. But neither of that all would bother him anymore, I'm sure of that."

Like I said before, Sam would be so reassuring and good at explaining things around times like that. When it comes to reasoning, I would count on her for without a doubt, she could give advice pretty well if you were in the situation. Explaining things could be good for what she does and says. She seems really silly I know, but if you knew her like I did for all these years, going through stuff like that, I think she gives good explanations. I could count on her for sure when it comes to that.

"How long have you been playing guitar Shawn? Claire told me you played together back ago!" she asks.

"Did she now?" Shawn looking at me and giving me a silly face of, "You're guilty". I gave a guilty face back to him revealing my awkward smile and eyes closed a little.

"Yeah, I've been playing for 3 years to be exact. This being my fourth year!" he says excitingly.

"Cool," she replies, while we stop to cross an intersection across our town, then we go when the traffic signal said for us to go. A couple of cars remained stopped and waited as we crossed.

We then got to the suburbs of a neighborhood I have been at before, and the walk was not so bad.

"Have you been around here before Sam?" I ask her as we go into the open neighborhood. Seemed quiet.

"I've been to Young Neil's house before yeah, Stephen took me here not too long ago."

"Um, okay.. And how long ago was that exactly?" I reply.

"I think about a few months ago." We look at her with confused faces.

"Oh! This is it," she says as we stop in front of a red brick house that seemed nice. At least on the outside.

"You said the guy who lived here was named 'Young Neil'? That name right?" Shawn made sure.

"Yeah, he's a cool guy, you'll meet them inside."

"'Meet them'?" I asked whilst confused.

Sam walked up the front door and knocked on the door as we followed. Then we heard something fall down and make a loud crash sound. As we stood in the cold Shawn's hands, followed by mine, were in the open and Shawn was on my left and I was on his right, he grasped my left hand softly as we stood and waited to be approached behind Sam in front of the door.

Then the door opens and this guy in a blue button up long-sleeve is astounded to see us, along with some other guy kneeling on the floor inside the house picking up the crash cymbal of a drum set in the background, and we see it all as he opened the door and introduced himself.

"Hello, Sam."

"Stephen how's it going!" she tells him and they hug with his face being exposed to a smile with us witnessing.

"These must be your friends you said not too long ago on the phone. I'm Stephen Stills," he says to us while still hugging Sam with his head over her right shoulder, and he offers a handshake to both of us.

We shake his hand, and he says, "Nice to meet you two, Shawn and Claire."

"Woah, you know our names?" Shawn asks.

"Yeah, your friend Sam here told me your names over the phone along with your favorite colors and music taste. Pretty nifty huh?" he tells us, and we are astounded as well.

"Well, you can let us in now cousin," Sam tells him still with the same hug.

"Oh shit sorry," he says immediately.

Then we go inside the house. Right when you enter it's this drum set with red pearl coloring on the left of the big room. That would be the first thing you notice. The next would be the tan couch that's against the wall on the right side, with a tall lamp on the side of the couch. A small TV cabinet had a television inside of it that was on the opposite side of the couch behind the drum set, which must have had DVD's inside it. The place seemed nice at first.

As Stephen was about to introduce us to some new people me and Shawn had never seen before, he sighed and said their names while giving a suspicious look and said, "Welcome to the abyss. I'm Stephen Stills, here is Scott, Neil, Kim, and I."

"Hello nice to meet you all," I say to them and waved a little. Shawn did the same.

The guy that had dropped and picked up the cymbal was named Scott Pilgrim. His first impression towards us seemed pretty clumsy at first. Oh what would happen next?

"What's going on here? It looks like a session is about to start here," Shawn asks the people there.

"We were actually gonna start up and kick the jams to our famous band," Scott said with confidence.

"We're not famous, we suck," Kim Pine then said right after.

"I'd like to say we got a good thing going on, if anything, we could be spread throughout Toronto as soon as we could," Stephen says trying to make everything confident.

"You all are crazy," Sam says to him.

"So anyways, our session can't continue without Knives coming and watching us practice right?" Scott says to Stephen, which seemed a little annoyed.

"Well there already are enough people in here as it is," Kim says out of random.

"Oh. We can leave if it's not a bother or anything. It was nice meeting you all," I say right after, making me and Shawn heading to the front door.

"Wait! Don't you want to hear us play first?" Scott comes up to us from behind and says immediately.

"Well…" Shawn says, "Um, we don't know right now though."

"No it doesn't matter, you all could chill right now," Stephen butts in.

"All right then, we'll stay here then. Is that okay Claire?" Shawn asks me.

"Yeah sure.." I reply. With worry in my head.

"Okay then," Stephen puts his acoustic guitar that's plugged into an amp over his shoulder and the strap on. Then Scott gets his bass on and turns on his amplifier.

Scott then says, "Okay let's start off with 'Launchpad McQuack'!"

"-That's not the actual title of the song." Stephen says right after into the microphone on the mic stand.

Then they begin playing right after Kim yells while on the drums, "WE ARE SEX BOB-OMB. ONE-TWO-THREE-FOUR!" as we sit on the couch, the three of us, just watching and listening to them jam the hell out of it. Scott is playing his bass guitar very actively and moving along while Stephen strums his guitar that's plugged into the amp, and he sings ahead while Kim is on the drums playing loudly.

Stephen sings through the microphone:

"_Let me make the stasis, momma momma serpentine!_

_I got a breathalyzer, and my body's clean!"_

Scott and Stephen play an awesome riff together and Kim still banging on the drums loudly. It's amazing how the people live here and allow such rowdy and loud music, which is genius.

Shawn and I look at each other and just listen to the cool jams they play as I get lost in his eyes to the loud and messy music they play, and he just keeps looking at them playing.

I felt like I was blown away as they played and went on during the song, and Shawn could tell. I think Sam was just enjoying them playing while bobbing her head and tapping her foot on the carpet floor. It was a cool feeling!

As they finished right after Shawn says, "Whoa that was sweet! You guys rock!" then him and I both clap together for them. Stephen takes a little bow smiling with his eyes closed and Scott fist pumps in the air. Kim does nothing.

…

"So you play guitar bro?" Stephen asks Shawn as the group of Stephen, Sam, Shawn and I walk outside of Neil's house onto the sidewalk.

"Yeah man, I've been playing for years."

"Pretty nice dude. If you ever want to hear more of us play you know where to find us. Plus you can bring your own guitar if you'd like, and play along with us. You know, if you're down for it and all."

Stephen just offered Shawn to jam out with them!

"Hell yeah! That's rad man, I could totally join you guys," Shawn sounded excited and cute when he said that.

"It was all real cool to meet you guys. What did you say your band was called?" I asked him as Sam and Shawn listen in.

"Our band is called Sex Bob-Omb. Pretty cool name if you ask me."

"Awesome. Tell the others we said goodbye," I tell him.

So we walk home at around the evening time, and we drop off Sam at her apartment complex.

Then it was just me and him…

"I wish I had my car with me. That way at least both of us could stay a little warmer in the car than walking around with little snow falling," he says to me. I could see the cold air go through as he talked after breath.

"It's alright. I enjoyed staying as warm as I could with you…" I reply hugging him.

"You're so loving Claire. I love it.." he replies.

We both stop under a tree that was next to the park where we would hang out, next to the railing and steps that led to the park, on the sidewalk. He holds my arms and he leans in to kiss me, and I kiss him back. I put my hands on his neck and he continues to kiss my lips.

"Aww…" I say as we stopped and we just look at each other in the eyes. It was so great…

"_I've been waiting for this moment…"_

Then we just sit there under the tree, against the bark and lay on the grass near the sidewalk. It was just us. What a great winter this will be.


	6. Oh Sweet Is Our Love

**Oh Sweet Is Our Love: A telling from Shawn Mars**

_ Oh how sweet it is, and all that indulges our compelling and feelings toward each other, strive for only the best and greatest in our hearts. Only time would tell later for our deeds and what we have done in all. Is it what we thought it would be? How else could this be?_

_Like two minds alike, our feelings for each other are strong and tell much about ourselves. I see it in her, yet I know I have been blind. I see something in her that I couldn't see, until now. Time would only tell for me to see if something is true to me or if it is within my grasp of reality. These words…_

_These words come to my mind because of what I feel and think of her. These words can't come out of my mind. Like they are inside my head for a reason, a reason to be is that I haven't come to the thought of asking or doing many of what I thought should be done already. I'll only let time come and tell by then. The love I give for her is great and could only be given to me. It is my duty to give that love._

…

_I wouldn't be ready yet… not for her response at least. What we've done so far is nothing compared to what I have been thinking and thought about. Why am I feeling this? Is it because I "love" her? The feeling I get whenever I think about it is like how I would imagine her reaction or thoughts on it… why would I even go there in the first place? I don't think either of us would be ready for that anyway._

_Like I said: Only will I let that time come. If I truly loved her, I would let time come on its own, and not let things become rushed. For neither of us._

_How would I know? How would I know if I am ready for it? How would we know?_

_I ask these things because I'm only unsure of what I am thinking about. That certain topic… but I am not unsure about what me and her believe in and think about. Anything goes when it comes to Claire. At least it is for me. I want to give what she has needed all along.._

_What would her parents think? What would Dad think? It's too soon to even think about it yet… better yet too young to even go there. But I love her so much…_

_I want to show what my love could be like. Waiting isn't good enough. Not now at least! Not because I am selfish or anything, but because of what I'm worried for my Dad._

_The only way I could show my love and affection towards her is to keep loving and caring as much as I can, because I care so much about Claire. If I could tell someone in person how much I appreciate what she gives and delivers I would not be haste and let my thoughts personally flow through without hesitation._

_I wish I could let myself go and deliver what I feel to her. I wish it wasn't this complicated at all. It's even hard to think about. When I think about it, it feels disgraceful and wrong. But I love her…_

_I believe I can do it. I can tell her what I would want to do… how I really feel. It's only the beginning of winter anyway. Not like it won't be perfect or anything, but I want to make love to you, Claire Walls._

…

_I sat there and just looked at it, having my hands on my laps as I stared at the long stretch of the keys on the grand piano in my room._

_It was a sight to see. I observed the lack of dust and noticed that it would still look beautiful and graceful without customization or dust of any kind. I knew I would take care of this beautiful piece of music I call an instrument. The sound of the first key I pressed on when I touched it was the E chord. I had already known how to play piano, for I had lessons during the summer of 2009._

_I was only fourteen at the time, and when I got my first grand piano in my room, I was always baffled._

_There was a certain song I knew and loved ever since I was little, and I learned how to play it on piano and sing it. Now, I was only a freshman in high school, so I didn't really give a care in the world to know what the song actually meant. So then I played the song by memory, and I still know it to this day._

"_I heard there was a secret chord, that David played and it pleased the Lord_

_But you don't really care for music, do you?_

_It goes like this, the fourth, the fifth, the minor fall, the major lift_

_The baffled king composing Hallelujah._

_Hallelujah, Hallelujah._

_Hallelujah, Hallelujah._

_Your faith was strong but you needed proof, you saw her bathing on the roof_

_Her beauty and the moonlight overthrew you._

_She tied you to a kitchen chair, she broke your throne, she cut your hair_

_And from your lips she drew the Hallelujah._

_Hallelujah, Hallelujah_

_Hallelujah, Hallelujah._

_Maybe I have been here before, I know this room, and I've walked this floor_

_I used to live alone before I knew you._

_I've seen your flag on the marble arch, Love is not a victory march_

_It's a cold and it's a broken Hallelujah._

_Hallelujah, Hallelujah._

_Hallelujah, Hallelujah._

_There was a time you let me know, what's real and going on below_

_But now you never show it to me, do you?_

_And remember when I moved in you? The holy dark was moving to_

_And every breath we drew was a Hallelujah._

_Hallelujah, Hallelujah._

_Hallelujah, Hallelujah._

_Maybe there's a god above, and all I ever learned from love_

_Was how to shoot at someone who outdrew you._

_And it's not a cry you can hear at night, it's not somebody that's seen the light_

_It's cold and it's a broken Hallelujah._

_Hallelujah, Hallelujah."_

_I then appear at my grandmother's house during the winter of my freshman year on a weekend, where I finished playing and singing that song. My grandparents sat there across from me along with both my mom and dad, and my older brother standing next to the fireplace as it released warmth to the entire room we were in._

_That beautiful song allowed my mom to cry as she laid there with blankets over her and looking pale, my dad accompanying her with smiles on both their faces. They were clapping and saying such good things…_

_My mother. She died a month after. It was the worst experience I could ever hear._

_Pneumonia.._

_Then the flashback went back into my head and I remained sitting there looking at the piano I used to play the last song I played to my mother before she passed. I looked at it a little more, then picked up my phone and started dialing Claire._


	7. Passing Winter

**The Passing Winter**

It's winter time, which means there is more cold than usual. I mean like snowstorms and all, but other than that, it's time to stay warm. That's what I usually try to do, alone and warm, what I've been doing for a long time. Just being alone.

It's been a month passed and it's still cold outside even with Shawn next to me to keep me warm or whatever. The winter time actually gets me kind of sad, the weather and all; it makes me all gloomy and remembers how I used to be alone. I say that because I feel like I'm not alone anymore and I have Shawn to thank for all of that…

Anyways, it's been a month: now it's time to start talking about my life.

…

"Glad we made it back inside," Shawn says to me while I rush in before he shuts the door behind us.

"Yeah," I reply then smiling back at him.

"Is my dad home?" he asks me and himself, as he takes off his coat and lays it on his living room couch, and goes to the kitchen real quick.

"I guess not. Well that gives time to get a quick bite to eat around here," he says to me in the living room, then he goes to the kitchen and sticks his head out through a little opening that you could see through the kitchen and living room, and tells me what I'd like to eat.

I reply, "Do you like soup?"

"I like soup, yes," he says back to me.

"Well, soup would sound nice right now. Where can I put my coat?"

"Oh just put it around on top of my coat on the couch there, it'll be fine."

As I sat down on the couch next to our coats, I saw him through the little opening going through the pantry and looking for canned soup. I waited a little bit until one of us started talking again.

"So what did you think?" he asks me as he was busy, and I knew what he was talking about.

"It was cool. The headlining band could have done a little better though."

"Yeah I thought that too. What was the band called? The one that headlined," he asks.

It took a moment for me to remember… "Oh. Was the name 'Crash and the Boys'?"

"Oh yeah! The singer guy made it pretty clear what their name was. Kinda weird how they played though. And I thought local bands like that weren't so weird."

"Yeah."

"Have you ever been to that bar before?"

"The Rock-It? No I haven't."

"Yeah me neither, I only like it how bands play there, not a fan of the 'drinking' there really," he says to me, putting the opened cans of soup into bowls and putting the bowls into the microwave.

"I'm not a fan neither; the place seems like a toilet."

"That's what my thought was about it too," he smiles at me, and I smile back remaining quiet.

"Soup almost done?" I ask.

"Yeah just about."

"I'm hungry.. And cold."

"I feel you. If I don't get a hot meal about now then I'll go insane. Why didn't you bring an extra jacket to wear over your long-sleeve and under your coat?"

I reply with the most silliest face I could think of, "I dunno." I say it with a silly tone as well.

He smiles, and checks the ready bowls of soup for us and takes them out for ready to be eaten. The spoons are in the bowls now along with him bringing the warm food for him and I to consume, in the living room.

"Thank you so much Shawn, I'm so cold…"

"Hey don't worry sweetie, I got you to keep warm. Here you go," he hands me my bowl and I slowly start eating the chicken noodle soup. It didn't matter if it was too hot, the snowstorm outside kept the both of us too cold to care about the hot meals we have.

I barely notice his bowl of soup. It's tomato soup.

"Tomato soup, correct?" I ask.

"You know it. It's been my favorite soup for a while actually."

It's then quiet. We're too focused on being warm with our bowls, we didn't talk for a bit. Plus we were sitting on the carpet in his large living room.

"Soup is my favorite meal. Honestly I can eat it for day after day and probably won't be tired of it until I don't know when. But I love it."

"Nice. I love you."

I smile. "I love you too Shawn. And your great soup skills."

"Oh thanks for that, maybe I'd like to be a chef when I'm older."

I look at him with a silly suspicion, "Really?" but I didn't believe him.

He looks at me with the same expression, "Definitely not!" and he takes another scoop of soup and eats.

We just about finished our soups.

"Well, it didn't fill me up, but I'm satisfied," he says putting both our bowls on the carpet next to us.

I thought on what to say after that. Then I thought of another thing.

"Have you thought of calling your dad?" I ask him.

"I actually didn't think of that. Maybe he'll turn up and call me instead," he says while he takes our bowls up to the kitchen.

"Okay then…" I remain seated on his carpet.

When he gets back he just looks at me. Then he rushes towards me and starts tickling me! I couldn't help myself but shove him away a little while he tickled me, but I was too late…

He playfully falls on the carpet and lies there. Then I strike forward from the couch onto him and start tickling him as he lays there and laughs aloud!

Oh the way we looked, just the two of us enjoying our time together. The rest of winter is left to us, enjoying it all together. I imagined next how we looked on the floor tickling and laughing, from his outside window, the snow falling beautifully.

Then I'm enjoying it to the part where he keeps on laughing and I remain tickling him, with me sitting and on top of his lap, a little closer to…

Then I felt his hands reach my stomach and he tries to tickle me, the both of us laughing! Then I lay on top of him and lean forward, only to the part where my… breasts are near his chest, and we're face to face. I'm on top of him and he lays there with his hands on my waist…

Then we kiss. And I couldn't be more aroused…


End file.
